Smartphones weren’t really all that popular until 2007, and none of the ones before the iPhone 3G or like the Blackberry’s could really run Facebook all that well. The iPhone never really blew up to the level it’s at now until the 4 arguably, which didn’t come out until 2010 or 2011 (think it was 2010). Facebook had already been pretty infected before then.

Narrator:This person, naturally, remained celibate for their entire life.

Nope. You got the time period right, but I would like to posit it’s when they started letting our Parents, drunk uncles and dumb ass aunties on Facebook.

The problem always has, and always will be, Facebook.